The DEFEND Cleveland Show

Cavs Mid-Season Report: Why no Basketball?

cavs midseason 2014

Editor’s Note – For proper context, please know that this 13 point Cavaliers Mid-Season Report by Jon was written in reaction to two things in particular, 1 – To explain why he hadn’t yet written much about these 2013-2014 Cleveland Cavaliers, and 2 – Because, like you, Jon loves this team regardless of all the pain it causes. Enjoy~

 
1 – Haven’t even touched basketball.

2 – Been knee deep in horse shit, happy about it, running around in pools of blood, screaming like children, laughing as we splash each other, faces and arms. But haven’t been sledding. Good snow, too cold though.

3 – Been to terrible planets, faced monsters known to do no good now to man, known only for charismatic leadership circles on the decks of orphan ships. Paid the fare for the RTA even though the inconsistencies.

4 – Been star fucking in the streets of Hollywood under surnames used as pen names. Dreaming good through these dry nights.

5 – I have been everywhere but covering the Cavs, though I’ve been running myself under their faucet of cold water. I sit wet for their frigid games. As my hair turns ice I watch in x or 2x ffwd almost all of every court segment.

6 – I can see the runs that way.

7 – I still like Anthony Bennett.

8 – I like Dion Waiters more.

9 – I was wondering, partly, as dishes I did at the sink, about Christ Grant. Hermetic meditation it turned out to be, as in no one’s home. I don’t care about Christ Grant or Gilbert or Deng.

10 – I don’t even care about winning.

11 – I just want to watch decent basketball. I want to drink gin and yell at my walls in anything but derision. When I jerk off late at night, post-game, I want it to be a celebration not an attempted upper.

12 – No one is talking and I want more segues into the “my wife can correct your jump shot” anecdote I hold dear.

13 – I want to dream about losing.
 
 
-Jon Conley
 
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Posted by on Feb 11 2014. Filed under Featured, Show Reports. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0. You can leave a response or trackback to this entry

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