Mike James’ Week 11 NFL Picks
Last week Mike told a friend of his who’s a police officer about these NFL Picks of the Week he’s been posting here. This turned out to be a real bad idea. It’s one thing to go 0-3 in his picks, Mike’s done that multiple times this year, but it’s a whole other thing when his friend, who again, is a cop, loses money while betting on Mike’s picks. Our statistician Mr. Sanders went on to say after the fact, “Wait, you didn’t tell your officer friend that he was supposed to bet the opposite of your picks? I bet he wants to arrest your ass right now.” Mr. Sanders isn’t just good with statistics, he’s also the captain of obvious. With that said, and with Mike officially in hiding, we’ve still received his picks this week and we’re pushing them forward. Remember though, this is intended for entertainment purposes only, but if you have to, it might be best if you bet the opposite.
Mike is 15-14-1 on the year, and 0-3 last week…
Randomizer 1-5 on the year, and 1-2 last week…1
New York Jets -3 at Houston. Houston beating Cinci for all the world to see last Monday was a fluke, right? Sure that win puts them tied for top turd in a toilet filled AFC South, but no way T.J. Yates, the backup QB to a career backup QB (who’s also a guy that wasn’t even on the Texans roster until a month ago after Ryan Mallett acted like a bratty douchebag for the last time), can handle the constant pressure Todd Bowles’ defense is sure to be dialing up all afternoon. No way. Now, no one’s thinking the Jets offense is going to do anything special either, but given the fact that the Texans have absolutely no running game to speak of to counter the attack that’s coming, even if Watt and company can keep the game close, you still have to expect a refreshed coming off a bye Chris Ivory to do enough almost by himself to see New York win by 4 or more. It’s pronounced, J-E-T-S.
Randomizer Pick One: Seahawks -13 vs 49ers. Expecting the crumbling foundation of Seattle’s championship run at this point to win by two touchdowns seems a bit much, even though one of the two times they’ve done so this year came against San Francisco. But that was before Gabbert was given the charge… Chance is a sucker.
Denver -1 at Chicago. Given how poorly he’s played for most of the season, isn’t Peyton Manning being out with an injury possibly going to play out as a good thing? One would think there’s a decent chance. So how come the Broncos are down from opening as -3 favorites to only giving a single point to a Bears squad that’s getting the majority of the public’s action? Am I as high as I would be right now if I lived in Colorado and missing something here?2 Is Denver’s defense expected to be off for the day out trying to find the fountain of youth for Manning? Jay Cutler has been playing well and Chicago of late has been better than everyone expected, however, you’ve got to be kidding if you think Denver is going to lose this one. John Elway will fire himself if the Broncos don’t win, and don’t fear, Elway’s going nowhere. Brock Osweiler won’t look like an in his prime Peyton Manning, but he might end up looking a little like former Broncos Jake “The Snake” Plummer while fitting nicely into Kubiak’s offense under center and running bootlegs (some things Peyton apparently is really bad at), and he’ll certainly provide more than enough to help lead his team back on track and past Chicago. Here’s hoping Elway someday does fire himself because that would make for such a great story, just don’t in any way expect it to happen this week.
Randomizer Pick Two: Bills +7 at Patriots. Pretty sure he already controls chance, but if this comes true and the Pats can’t beat Rex Ryan and the Bills running away, Bill Belichick will surely have your head, Randomizer.
Arizona -4.5 versus Cincinnati. Finally, a freaking game this week that doesn’t feature a backup QB starting for either side. Half the games this Sunday will see at least one backup QB starting, which is just one of the many reasons why this matchup has all the makings of “Game Of The Week” material. When you start to dig into the details with these two very talented teams, the NFC West leading Cardinals sure look like the real deal on both sides of the ball. Meanwhile, last week Andy Dalton finally started to look like Andy Dalton and the Bengals’ win streak seemingly ended because of it. Expect less pelvic thrusts in celebration from Carson Palmer after such a display cost him 11K in Week 10, but he’ll certainly be dancing with joy in front of his home field crowd as he beats down his former team. Along with the sharps I liked this line even better at the -2.5 it opened at, but as long as it stays under -5, I’m still confident the Cardinals can deliver against the no longer undefeated Bengals who are poised to suffer yet another let down. Go Cards.
Randomizer Pick Three: Buccaneers +5.5 at Eagles. Not going to lie, I may hate betting on chance, but I like the Randomizer’s odds with this one.
– Mike James
The DC Show with host Mike James airs live every Monday morning from 9am-11:30am on WRUW-FM 91.1 Cleveland, and streams world wide here.
- Starting Week 9 we started having Mike bet against chance, and after last week chance is now winning. Please read the last two week’s posts on how we set up the Randomizer in making its picks. [↩]
- Make that doubly as high, because Colorado is high altitude mountain life too, you know… [↩]
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